


Trying Not To Waste My Time

by godots



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Drabble, First Time, Loss of Virginity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-07
Updated: 2016-12-07
Packaged: 2018-09-07 04:48:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8783770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godots/pseuds/godots
Summary: in which growing up is full of first times and misdirected feelings





	

He didn't feel incomplete before, but its like there's a whole other side of him now. One that he carries around with himself now. A knowledge that he has that suddenly makes the world look a little different. Like being part of a secret club and that sounds dumb and he feels dumb thinking it but it's true. He's different even when he's making dinner or lying around in bed and he didn't think it would be like this. 

Because actually having sex isn't that big a deal. He knows all the theory behind it, every teenager has seen porn, he knows exactly what he's in for and while it's happening he's so calm because he's pretty much got this, he knows what goes where. But, but. it's really not anything like that at all. Because he's naked with someone and they have their hands all over him, on his naked thighs and moving his legs apart, up over his shoulder and wow so he's never been in this position at all. and it's just nothing he's experienced before. (does Derek think he's hot like this or does he just look dumb? because he kind of feels both)

It's intimate and uncontrolled and it's bizarre that little things are overwhelming him, like Derek rubbing his stubble on the inside of his thighs. It feels scratchy and painful enough he jerks away but Stiles is panting and his skin is prickling EVERYWHERE with chills. There's a constant sense of something awkward the whole time. 

Because there's no way to hide all the embarrassing parts of his body and there's no way to not compare himself to Derek and he can't even tell what Derek is thinking, of how he compares to what Derek is used to in bed. His thighs aren't as thick, his stomach not as tight. He's paler & fleshier, more boyish, he's got freckles, pimples, moles and Derek can see, is looking at and touching all of his skin. all the parts of him he usually gets to hide, make look better under his clothes. 

He's barely even kissed anyone before this, truth or dare isn't trying to keep up with someone's tongue in your mouth while they put their hand into your underwear and then you have to figure out what kind of noise you're supposed to make. He probably sounds like an idiot though because he's moaning like he's in porn even though he's freaking out a bit and he's too nervous to even really enjoy it much. He can't turn his brain off for this. 

And your first time having sex hurts, he has to make Derek stop because its too much and it stings. Derek gives him a minute to adjust then he's pushing in again and Stiles knows he's thrusting in shallow little bursts but it burns and Stiles' whole brain is caught up in the pain and how this is totally not happening. Telling his body to relax and let it happen doesn't help. He is just way too tight and this is just too sore. 

His voice is high and urgent when he stops Derek "no you gotta stop, you have to give me a minute. i can't." 

"of course" Stiles can't really read an emotion from his face but this obviously feels a lot better for Derek than Stiles and it sucks a bit. It'll get better after the first time Stiles knows that but he doesn't think Derek is going to be able to get in him properly if it hurts this much, he's just too big to fit. 

"Relax, just relax it'll be fine" Derek tells him and before Stiles can tell him how fucking relaxed he is Derek is thrusting again, more steadily than before and it hurts but either Stiles is more relaxed or he's just adjusting to the pain because it's bearable now. 

Stiles doesn't come while Derek's fucking him. After a while Derek pulls out and puts his head between Stiles legs and he's licking and sucking at Stiles dick and balls and oh god this is holyshityess good. Stiles has his legs wrapped around Derek's head, lower body arched off the bed as he pants and gasps through how crazy awesome it feels. 

After Stiles comes like that and slumps back to the mattress chest heaving and brain shorted out Derek lays down stretched out next to him and gets Stiles jerking him off, guiding his hand, course-correcting to what feels best. Before he can come in Stiles hand he twist around and grabs tissues from beside the bed and finishes himself off and Stiles isn't sure how he feels about that but. 

At some point, like his muscles have to figure out this new way of moving, they eventually get with the program because soon enough Stiles barely remembers the ache of first being fucked. Somehow it just becomes a thing he body is perfectly capable of, even good at.

**Author's Note:**

> if we were on lj this would be not!fic


End file.
